Totes adorbs Illinois Congressman Aaron Schock left congress today in shame after it was discovered that he had spent ridiculous sums of taxpayer money on glamorous overseas trips, and on an office decorated in the style of Downton Abbey.
Oozing charm from every pore, he oiled his way right out the door. But he gave a farewell speech, before.
The Chicago Tribune headline says, "Schock leaves Congress with sadness, humility."
I scoured the article looking for evidence of Schock's humility. "God, do I suck! What a fool I am! How can anyone ever forgive me for being such a vane, clueless, narcissistic twit! How can I ever forgive myself!?"
Instead, Shock said, "Few faced as many defeats in his personal business and public life as he did," Schock said of Abraham Lincoln! "His continual perseverance in the face of these trials—never giving up—is something all of us Americans should be inspired by, especially when going through a valley in life."
Lincoln's been rolling over in his grave so long and for so many reasons, I wonder if he bothers to do it any more. But if he does, this would be the occasion.
Schock concluded, "I know that God has a plan for my life."
Hey Schock: Did it ever occur to you that maybe this was it?
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